Quotes from Arctic Radar


Sam: Listen, I wouldn't ask you to postpone your vacation if it wasn't important.
Will: When did you ask me to postpone my vacation?
Sam: Well, I'm obviously about to right now.
Will: Okay, well, then, your shoelaces are untied and I'm hauling ass.

Toby: Sam's doing a little matchmaking.

Toby: Call and response isn't going to work in front of a Joint Session, you're alliteration happy, "Guardians of gridlock," "Protectors of privilege," I needed an avalanche of Advil. And when you use pop culture references your speech has a shelf-life of twelve minutes. You don't mind constructive criticism, do you?
Will: No, sir.
Toby: Anyway... thanks for coming in. I told Sam I can do this by myself.
Will: Well, maybe he thought that your speeches were obscurantist policy tracts lost in a cul-de-sac of their own internal self-rightousness and groaning from the weight of statistics. I'm just speculating. I can't say for sure.

Josh: What are you working on?
Jack: A memo for the C.O. at a radar station in the Arctic Circle.
Josh: You ever been there?
Jack: Yeah.
Josh: What's it like?
Jack: Small town feel, nicest people you'll ever meet, and a terrific symphony if you like classical music with a pops orchestra on Sunday nights.
Josh: Really? No. There's no symphony or people.
Jack: Right. On the other hand, Sunday night does last six months.

Josh: Tell me your aide's name, I'll ask her out, we'll double.
Jack: Chief Petty Officer Harold Wendell.
Josh: I got the fuzzy end of that lollipop.

Bartlet: I don't know what's worse, being stupid or pretending to be stupid.

Bartlet: There are big signs, you can't park there! They should get towed! I hope they get towed to Queens and the Triboro's closed and there's a big crafts show at Shea, a flea market, or a tractor show!

Bartlet: You're right.
Leo: That's... that's an ususual phrase for you, sir. Did you just learn it?
Bartlet: You didn't let me finish.
Leo: I had a hunch.

Toby: All right. All right. Chances are you have certain qualities that are going to annoy me. I don't know what they are yet, but you have a certain quality about you that says that even though you're a capitalist you've been schooled in eastern philosophies.
Will: I told you to go to Atlantic City.
Toby: You didn't deny you've been schooled in eastern philosophies.
Will: Well-schooled. Want me to locate your chakra?
Toby: Look...
Will: I'm a lawyer.
Toby: Good, 'cause they're never annoying.


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