Leo: I'm not saying I don't think you can be impressive in the Situation Room.
Bartlet: I can tell by the way you laughed in my face at the suggestion that I was.

Zoey: I love seeing my two men sparring.
Bartlet: I'm sorry?
Jean Paul: She's very fond of you.
Bartlet: Excellent.

Toby: Get over the dress, would you?
C.J.: It was a suit, and they hit me with an avocado.
Toby: It could have been worse.
C.J. How?
Toby: They could have hit me.

Toby: You've got twins in there. You're basically a minivan. How are you fitting into a seat?

Bartlet: Will it stimulate the economy, Josh?
Bartlet: It'll stimulate the Swiss economy.
Bartlet: Josh gets extra credit for being funny and right at the same time.

Will: That isn't a staff, Toby, those are the Robert Palmer girls.

Bartlet: The French have denied us access to their airspace. I'm not sure why they think we're gonna need it to get from here to Africa, but what the hell.

Cassie: Will, we're interns, do you think we have any clue as to how to write a tax-policy speech?
Will: Well, I'm sure you had to write in college in the many many government and poly-sci and econonmics classes you took while attending...?
Cassie: The London School of Ballet.
Will: What the hell are you doing here?
Cassie: I'm changing direction.

Sam: I have no idea what makes me say this, but it's good to see you.

Aide: You're gonna get creamed.
Sam: Heh. Like I'm not used to that.

Donna: Communists look exactly like non-Communists.

Bartlet: Toby and Charlie were arrested in a bar fight.
Josh: Yes, sir, it's not gonna be a problem. C.J.'s taking care of it.
Bartlet: Really?
Josh: It's gonna be a little bit of a problem.
Bartlet: Everytime we come to Southern California we are absolutely the Clampetts!