Quotes from Ways and Means


Donna: I grew up on a farm.
Josh: You grew up in a condo.
Donna: I grew up near a farm. I was cute and I was peppy, and I always did well on my 19th century English literature midterms 'til you came along and sucked me into your life of crime.
Josh: Hey, I'm not...
Donna: White collar crime, boy.

C.J.: We need a different enemy.

Leo: Rollins likes us.
C.J.: I don't know if he likes us but he doesn't hate us.
Leo: Well, that's just because he doesn't know us.

Margaret: You still don't know my name, do you.
Bruno: It's Gertrude.
Margaret: It's not.

Bruno: Man, you have got a killer body. You know that.
C.J.: In fact, I do.

Doug: A million dollars isn't what it used to be.
Toby: And they don't make good yachts anymore.

Josh: Toby, I just don't know on how many fronts we can fight a war. You wanna find out?
Toby: Yeah.

C.J.: I want you to get with one of your friends in the pressroom from a conserervative paper.
Ainsley: You really think we have a secret handshake, don't you.
C.J.: Do you?
Ainsley: Yes.

Bartlet: Charlie?
Charlie: Yes, sir.
Bartlet: Are we out of pens? That's a good pen, I need an everyday pen.
Charlie: I've got pens.
Bartlet: You've got crappy pens with plastic tops. I need a solid pen that feels good in my hand but it's not so formal I feel like a dandy.

Charlie: You need a secretary, sir.
Bartlet: I have five secretaries, to say nothing of the secretaries of state, defense, treasury, and education.

Donna: You were leaving.
Cliff: No, I just came out to stretch my legs.
Donna: You shouted for a cab.
Cliff: I like to test them.
Donna: I usually look a lot better than this. I mean, I can look good.
Cliff: I don't have any trouble believing that.

Josh: These are members of the Congressional Black Caucus. Can you think of any reason why they'd oppose the estate tax?
Leo: Sure.
Josh: Why?
Leo: The first generation of black millionaires is about to die.

Bartlet: Letting this fire burn is good for the environment. You know how I know?
Leo: How?
Bartlet: Because smart people told me. Please, God, Leo, let them be right.

Donna: Why are you a Republican?
Cliff: Because I hate poor people. I hate them, Donna. They're all so poor. And many of them talk funny and don't have proper table manners. My father slaved away at the Fortune 500 company he inherited so that I could go to Choate, Brown and Harvard, and see that this country isn't overrun by poor people and lesbians.

C.J.: Come and get us.


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