Quotes from Stirred

Hoynes: My meeting. Leo stays.

Donna: I shall do those things.
Josh: You shall?
Donna: I shall... and I'll tell you what I'd like in exchange.
Josh: How about a weekly salary of some kind?
Donna: Yes, plus a favor.

Sam: Up's better than down.

Bartlet: I love doing this.
Charlie: Really?
Bartlet: Yeah.
Charlie: Filing tax returns.
Bartlet: Yeah.
Charlie: Okay.
Bartlet: What?
Charlie: I was just thinking about the plurality of Americans who made the decision to pull a lever that had your name next to it.
Bartlet: Suckers.

Bartlet: Can I tell you what's messed up about James Bond?
Charlie: Nothing.
Bartlet: Shaken, not stirred, will get you cold water with a dash of gin and dry vermouth. The reason you stir it with a special spoon is so not to chip the ice. James is ordering a weak martini and being snooty about it.

Charlie: They're saying I owe the federal government money?
Bartlet: And you don't even need a stamp. Hand it over.
Charlie: There's a mistake.
Bartlet: Whatever. Hand it over.

Bartlet: This whole night I'm going to be a half-hour smarter than you.

Josh: What's next, executive clemency if you're having a bad hair day?
Donna: I never have a bad hair day.

Leo: The problem is we don't know anything.
Bartlet: That's never been a problem for us before.

Bartlet: I should set a ransom. "I'll tell you what the radiation levels are, but first I want your electoral votes." Or is that a bad strategy?
Leo: It's pretty bad.
Bartlet: Okay, no ransom, we'll play this one straight.

Hoynes: Screw it, Sam.
Sam: Absolutely, Mr. Vice-President.

Toby: The most dangerous place in Washington is between Bill Fisher and a TV camera.

Leo: You can go home now.
Margaret: I go home when you go home.

Bartlet: John, despite this recent revelation that you drank beer in college, I've always liked you a little more than you thought I did. But that's not why you're staying. It's this. Four words.
Hoynes: I've always liked you more than you thought I did, too, Mr. President.
Bartlet: Just a little, right?
Hoynes: Yes, sir.
Bartlet: Me too.

Donna: Mrs. Morello, I'm in the Oval Office with the President of the United States and it's because of you.

Sam: Am I really the only one that thinks a giant sumo wrestler in a hockey goal might get the job done?
Josh: I don't know. I'm open to new ideas.

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