Quotes from And It's Surely to Their Credit


Josh: Donna!
Donna: Don't shout.
Josh: Donna, come here!
Donna: Did you hear me say "Don't shout?"
Josh: No.
Donna: Do you know why?
Josh: Because you weren't shouting.
Donna: That's right.
Josh: That's right.

Bartlet: This is going to be it. Four is my lucky number.
Donna: This is take five, sir.
Bartlet: Five is my lucky number. "Fifth-take Bartlet," that's what Jack Warner used to call me.
Donna: Did you really know Jack Warner, Mr. President?
Bartlet: Yeah, because I used to be a contract player in Hollywood and I'm ninety-seven years old.
Donna: Okay.

C.J.: Have you noticed that I'm one of the few people around here whose nose isn't bent out of shape over Ainsley Hayes?
Toby: Yeah. Listen...
C.J.: I'm serious.
Toby: You heard the news and you slammed the door so hard it broke. Okay, you heard the news and you broke the White House.

Ainsley: I just want to die.
Leo: It's the White House, you get used to that feeling.

Lionel: Leo! I will kill people today, Leo. I will kill people with this cricket bat which was given to me by Her Royal Majesty Elizabeth Windsor and then I will kill them again with my own hands.

Bartlet: Well, obviously Lionel Tribbey is a brilliant lawyer whom we cannot live without or there would be very little reason not to put him in prison.

Toby: I like a country where you can sue the insurance company but not the people who shot you.

Sam: Josh, the Southern Poverty Law Center wants you to sue the Knights of the Ku Klux Klan for a hundred million dollars.

Bartlet: It's been fourteen weeks. Do these curtains close?
Abbey: Not here, Jed.
Bartlet: Yes, you're right. Where?
Abbey: How about our bedroom?
Bartlet: New Hampshire's an hour and a half by plane, Abbey, I don't have that kind of time.
Abbey: How about our bedroom in the residence?
Bartlet: Yes! We have a bedroom right here in the building. That was so smart.
Abbey: Yes.
Bartlet: Let's go.
Abbey: Jed.
Bartlet: What?
Abbey: Korea, plutonium.
Bartlet: Oh, God, I hate plutonium.
Abbey: We have to find time before six.
Bartlet: What happens at six?
Abbey: I have to fly to Cochrane's Mills, Pennsylvania.
Bartlet: Where the hell is Cochrane's Mills?
Abbey: Pennsylvania.
Bartlet: Right.
Abbey: So, you talk to Charlie, I'll talk to Lily, we'll coordinate our schedules and we'll find a free hour.
Bartlet: I don't think it's going to take more than a couple of minutes but I like your confidence.

Ainsley: I'd like to do well on this, my first assignment. Any advice you could give me that might point me the way of success would be, by me, appreciated.
Lionel: Well, not speaking in iambic pentameter might be a step in the right direction.

Charlie: Would you like to come back inside and take another swing at the radio address?
Bartlet: Sure. Would you like to get that smile off your face before I send you on special assignment to the Yukon?

Barrie: How about we discuss new defense spending being down to three-hundred billion from four-hundred billion ten years ago? Is that personal?
C.J.: No, sir, I think that's about the Cold War ending ten years ago and America not needing to spend quite so much money defending itself against a country that can't bake bread.

Abbey: You don't know who she is, do you?
Bartlet: This isn't happening to me.
Abbey: She pioneered investigative journalism.
Bartlet: Then she's the one I want to beat the crap out of.

Bartlet: Keep talking. I'm just going to sit here and think about plutonium and the things I can do with it.

Lionel: What are you looking at?
Sam: I'm... nothing. I'm not... nothing! Except it's from "Pinafore."
Lionel: It's from "Penzance."
Sam: I hate to stick my head in the lion's mouth, but I gotta ask you, were you the recording secretary of the Princeton Gilbert and Sullivan society for two years?
Lionel: No, but then again I'm not a woman.
Sam: So, I'm just saying...
Lionel: Little drinks I'm supposed to be having right now, umbrellas sticking out of them. Shishkebob!

Bartlet: By the way, Sweet Knees, the Statue of Liberty.
Abbey: Get upstairs.
Bartlet: Right there are the front door to the country.
Abbey: Get upstairs.
Bartlet: Like a lawn jockey.


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